So really what influences my mental health is the wear and tear of this work… I have to keep a full client load usually. So four clients a month typically is full time for me. Sometimes I do as many as seven or eight because of the need that exists. I take clients with all types of backgrounds, all types of birth experiences. I take Medicaid patients, Medicaid clients and it’s exhausting. The appointments are exhausting. The work is hard and long and sometimes traumatic. From the patient experience–from watching the way patients are sometimes treated by providers, nurses, midwives–I have watched midwives be abusive. To try and be present and be an advocate and show up for our client in that situation–t’s exhausting. It wears on you. And like so many others, I’m sure I’m not successful at finding that balance of work and processing everything that we take into our bodies and the work that we do…and trying to keep my, my headspace healthy and well for myself…I try and keep myself accountable for wellness…and so, you know, I don’t know how that shapes my, you know, my interactions with other colleagues and my patients. I put my patients, my, my clients first and I’m so honored to be able to serve in the space even in the moments when it’s hard. And that’s when I kind of feel like we’re just needed the most, right?
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The Community, Equity, Data, and Inclusion (CEDI) lab is a part of the College of Information at the University of Maryland.